Goodbye Mammaw

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My Grandma (Mammaw) is 91 years old she has had pneumonia for sometime now. She has fought an incredible fight, but she is now worn out. The doctor has said this is the end. When I saw her on Tuesday she was pretty much out of it. On Wednesday Lance and my mom, brother, and sister were able to reach her and spent some very sweet time with her. On Thursday two of my uncles flew in to say goodbye and they all experienced something very special My sister was able to get Mammaw to wake up and even eat breakfast. She talked and laughed with her children and then by lunch time she started to slip away again. Unfortunately I missed both of her awake times. The first time I was in a meeting at Scott's school and the second time I was at Brycen's evaluation for kindergarten. I am very glad though that we have been visiting her regularly so I have had some nice times with her. Today we could not wake her at all.

The thought of losing her has made me realize what an important part of my life she has always been. When I was a toddler sometimes she was the only one that could get me to eat. My mom would call her and she would come by after work and feed me. I even remember her rocking me to sleep. As a child on Saturday morning I would lay in bed and listen for Mammaw and Pappa's voices (and the smell of coffee) that always meant they had brought us donuts--the white ones with sprinkles. Whenever it "stormed" she would become frightened and make Pappa drive her to our house. I loved those times I would sleep with her on the pull out bed. She would tell me stories and I would rub the soft, soft skin on her arms--I always told her, her skin was softer than my softy blanket. In high school she even called the school's office to tell them I was sick, so I could have one more day to study for a test--thanks Mammaw. She attended my graduation from BYU, even though this meant spending 12 hours in the car, and she was rather fearful of being in cars. A great deal of the thanks for that trip goes to my Uncle Eddie and Aunt Connie who tried to keep her calm for all those long hours. She was not able to travel to Utah for our wedding, but she called the hotel just before we headed out the door to the temple. At the time I thought it was rather inconvenient to have to talk to her at that moment, now the picture of me on the phone with her that day is priceless to me. She came to the hospital when Zac and Scott were born. She was one of the first people to hold Zac. She came as soon as she could to meet Brycen. She and Zac have always had a sweet connection. Recently when we would visit her she had a hard time remembering me, but she always recognized Zac. I will miss her very much. Mammaw, I love you forever.